Victoria W.Wollie (Good News Monrovia Church, Liberia)
I was born in a Christian family and trained to the
doctrine of the Episcopal Church, but it could not lead me to the truth of the
forgiveness of sin. I hated my life falling deeper into sin, but I did not have
the willpower to change it. Rather, I fell into sin much deeper. On top of that,
I had to take refuge abroad to escape the Liberian Civil War, and my husband abandoned
and left me. On the verge of destruction, I was connected to a church and the
Word I heard there taught me that I am already a sinner. I heard the gospel at
the Bible Retreat and could be saved from sin. Now I want to share this
pleasure with my loving children and everyone in the world.
BEING BORN INTO A CHRISTIAN
FAMILY COULD NOT GIVE ME THE FORGIVENESS OF SIN
My parents are from a small town called Fish Town in Maryland
County in South Eastern Liberia. Maryland is a county close to Liberia’s border
near Côte d’Ivoire (Ivory Coast). Fish Town is a coastal town making it a place
easily accessed by early missionaries. My father told me that it was through the
sea access that missionaries from America and England came with the gospel to
this small town, Fish Town. My grandfather became a Catechist and shared the
gospel with my father.
My father said this is how his Christian life began.
My father
moved to the American rubber plantation, Firestone, in search for a job. There
he met my mother and I was the first child borne. When I was growing up, my father
told his children about God and salvation through Jesus Christ. I believe he must
have told my mother about God because my mother went to the same church with
him and she had no previous church affiliation.
We attended an Episcopal Church. My father was very passionate
about worshiping God and he wanted me to be trained to the doctrine of the
Episcopal Church so he enrolled us into schools operated by the Episcopal Church.
I was baptized at an Episcopal Girls’ School, Bromley Mission and later became
confirmed. We learned the Confession of Sins, and many other prewritten prayers
that we recited at services. We never prayed our own prayers but we used the
pre-recorded prayers. I learned the Ten Commandments and recited them clearly.
I was taught that I needed to abide by the Ten Commandments. So when I realized
I had failed in any, I needed to confess my sins to God and my sins will be
forgiven through the blood of Jesus Christ.
I HATED MY LIFE BUT I DID NOT
HAVE THE WILLPOWER TO CHANGE IT
We went to church frequently and prayed sometimes; and, my
father would call for prayer every now and then. I wondered so many times whether
God heard our prayers. My parents were poor and struggled to support us in terms
of getting just one meal and even more to give us education. I heard my father
sing hymns whenever he was alone or was in a contemplating state of mind. Even
though my parents were Christians, in Côte d’Ivoire they went to
fortune-tellers and sought blessings from the ancestors by paying homage to the
dead. Whenever there was a problem, my father would get up early in the morning
and called on the spirit of his mother to help him.
I
disrespected my parents and followed friends into doing things that I knew were
wrong but I did not have the willpower to stop. I had a very bad temper and I would
use profane language. I went with my friends to parties and night clubs where
we drank alcohol. I only went after earning money and satisfying my fleshly
desires. My life became more and more miserable as I followed my friends. I
went deeper and deeper into sin. I hated myself. I did not have the willpower
to change it.
Yes, I
had heard of Jesus. It was compulsory to memorize the Ten Commandments, and
otherwise
I would fail the subject. I was encouraged to keep the Ten
Commandments so that I can appear holy before God. I was told that Jesus took
my sins away. At the same time, I was taught to say the confession prayer and
repent of sin whenever I realized I have sinned. I read and studied the Bible
as part of my school lessons and at church when the priest called for reading.
Whenever
I read the Bible, I became frightened. I prayed whenever I had difficulty asking
for God’s help. I doubted that God listened to my prayers and that scared me
more. I could not find any way out of my sin and guilt. Satan put a thought in
me,
“You better satisfy your flesh in the world. You cannot
go to
heaven.” At this crucial point, I was at a crossroads and
Satan was putting thoughts in me like; “You cannot live a Christian life. Just
live and have fun. When you die it is finished.”
If God is
there why did He make me this way? Why do I continue to do the things I know
God hates even when I purposed in my heart I will not hurt God? Why can’t I
find some answer in the church? I was disappointed in going to church because I
could not find an answer to the problem of my sins. I felt the church was too
holy for a person like me. I blamed myself for my sins and wanted to stay far
away from God.
ON THE VERGE OF DESTRUCTION
I lived like this for many years and in my innermost part,
there was something wrong with the way I was living my Christian life. I began
to search for how I could live a life free from sins. I began moving from one
church to the other. I tried to take the Holy Spirit like others. I would throw
myself on the floor and roll, but I knew this was false. I tried to speak in tongues,
but it was all falsehood.
I
listened to many sermons and teachings but there was something still missing.
And the problem was with sin. I read in the Bible that God is holy so we need
to be holy. I struggled to attain a clean holy Christian life. I would repent
and pray and at that moment I would believe,“OK, I have repented. God has
forgiven me, and I am now free from my sins.” But, not even an hour from that point,
I again found myself guilty. I would pretend that I was a good Christian in the
presence of people. However, during my private time, when I did an evaluation
of myself, I found out that I am like Naaman, the captain of the host in 2
Kings chapter 5. I realized that in the Bible, God is a just God. My falsehood was
deceiving myself. My heart was heavy and I had notrue joy. In this desperation,
the Liberian Civil War began and I traveled to Côte d’Ivoire as a refugee.
Meanwhile, I had limited contact with my husband. During one of our conversations
on the phone he informed me that he was now married in the U.S. because life
was difficult for him so he needed a partner to help him. At the same time, I
had to cope with my daughter who was seriously sick. I was disappointed and
frustrated. I decided to solve the problems using my own method. I courted a
man with marriage in mind, but finally we departed. It carried me further and
further away from God and deeper and deeper into sin and degradation.
RESCUED BY THE TRUTH OF THE
GOSPEL
Then I moved with my family to Ghana. My sister
encouraged me to go to church to hear the Word of God. We worshipped once at a Ghanaian
church, but because of the language barrier, we did not understand the sermons;
so, we stopped going to church. One day my sister informed me that she had met
a Liberian who told her that she was worshipping at a Korean church where the people
spoke little English. Upon hearing this, we went to the church (Good News Mission
Accra Church) the next Sunday.
I
listened keenly even though the English that was spoken was very poor. Citing the
Words in Romans 5:19 the pastor began his sermon by talking about how we became
sinners.
For as by
one man’s disobedience many were made sinners, so by the obedience of one shall
many be made righteous.(Romans 5:19)
I became
astonished at that information, “So, I was already a sinner?” My ears opened
very wide so that even with the poorly spoken English, I wanted to know more
and more about how I could put away sin. All along I was made to believe that
the sins I committed made me a sinner. The pastor referred us to the book of Leviticus
chapter 4, in which the laws of sin offerings were explained. I have never been
told about this. My eyes began to open to the plan of God for us as the pastor
led us through the Scriptures in Romans 3:19–24.
. . . But
now the righteousness of God without the law is manifested, being witnessed by
the law and the prophets; Even the righteousness of God which is by faith of
Jesus Christ unto all and upon all them that believe: for there is no
difference: For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God; Being justified
freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus:
Then
there was a one-week Bible Retreat in December 2003 in Tema, Ghana. I did not
know that my journey to the Bible Retreat in Tema would be the turning point in
my life. The pastor led us through the book of Genesis about creation and the
fall of man. At the Retreat I was able to understand the passage: For all have
sinned, and come short of the glory of God.
I was always confused with this statement. If we all have
sinned and come short of the glory of God then how can we qualify for heaven?
Many of my friends and I justified ourselves with the kind of life we lived,
but my mind was troubled. Deep down in my heart, there was a missing piece in
the plan of God these many years I lived as a Christian.
During
the Bible Retreat, Romans chapter 3 verses 19 to 26 came alive in me. I surrendered
all of my efforts seeking my own righteousness, and accepted the righteousness of
God through faith in Christ Jesus. It felt like a burden that I had carried
became lifted off my back. I was glad to know that
Jesus finished my sins and the sins of us all. In order
for us to share in His grace we only need to believe and have faith.
NOW SHARING THE TRUTH WITH MY
CHILDREN
I am thankful to God who gave me the grace to participate
in the Bible Retreat. Following this experience, I shared my experience of my new
birth in Christ with my two sons and two daughters. It was hard for them to
switch to the direction I had decided to take. I had led them for many years
into different churches since they were young; now I am telling them I was
wrong. They were confused and asked questions like
“How do we know that you are not wrong this time? Who knows
where else you will be leading us?”
It took
more than five years, but God led my children to receive salvation. They have
participated in the IYF World Camp in Ghana and in Liberia. Now we are all
attending the Good News Monrovia Church. I am so grateful to God for bestowing His
great mercy upon me and gave me this salvation.
From the Goodnews Magazine
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